Prince Philip has been awarded an Australian knighthood, so let’s take a look back at our newest knight’s most shining moments of brilliance.

Most commentators consider Prince Philip’s knighthood a gaffe on Tony Abbott’s part, but we’ll say this for the PM — as far as gaffes go, he’s got nothing on the Duke of Edinburgh.

Here are a few of our favourites:

  • To Aboriginal leader William Brin in Queensland in 2002: “Do you still throw spears at each other?”
  • To a British tourist in Papua New Guinea in 1998: “You managed to not get eaten, then?”
  • To a British student in China, in 1986: “If you stay here much longer, you’ll go home with slitty eyes.”
  • To a female sea cadet in 2012: “Do you work in a strip club?”
  • To British expats in Abu Dhabi in 2012: “Are you running away from something?”
  • To the President of Nigeria, who was in national dress, in 2003: “You look like you’re ready for bed!”
  • On Cantonese people, in 1986: “If it has four legs and it’s not a chair, if it’s got two wings and it flies but is not an aeroplane, and if it swims and it’s not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it.”
  • On Ethiopian art, in 1965: “It looks like the kind of thing my daughter would bring back from school art lessons.”
  • To English politican Lord Taylor of Warwick, who is black, in 1999: “And what exotic part of the world do you come from?”
  • His opinion of Beijing, during a visit there in 1986: “Ghastly.”
  • His opinion of Stoke-on-Trent, during a visit there in 1997: ”Ghastly.”
  • To a tourist in Budapest in 1993: “You can’t have been here long, you haven’t got a pot belly.”
  • To businessman Atul Patel, at a reception for influential Indians in 2009: “There’s a lot of your family in tonight.”
  • On the Duke of York’s house in 1986: “It looks like a tart’s bedroom.”
  • Prince Philip referred to German chancellor Helmut Kohl as “Reichskanzler” in 1997. Adolf Hitler was the last man to hold that title, in 1945.
  • On finances, in 1969: “We go into the red next year… I shall have to give up polo.”
  • To a female solicitor in 1987: “I thought it was against the law for a woman to solicit.”
  • On the recession in 1981: “A few years ago, everybody was saying we must have more leisure, everyone’s working too much. Now everybody’s got more leisure time, they’re complaining they’re unemployed. People don’t seem to make up their minds what they want.”
  • To the Aircraft Research Association in 2002: “You travel as much as we do, you appreciate the improvements in aircraft design of less noise and more comfort — provided you don’t travel in something called economy class, which sounds ghastly.”
  • At a fundraiser for the protection of turtle doves in Anguilla in 1965: “Cats kill far more birds than men. Why don’t you have a slogan: ‘Kill a cat and save a bird?’”
  • On counselling for servicemen in 1995: “We didn’t have counsellors rushing around every time somebody let off a gun. You just got on with it!”
  • To the Scottish Rural Women’s Institute in 1961: “British women can’t cook.”
  • To a Scottish driving instructor in 1995: “How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?”
  • To a fashion writer in 1993: “You’re not wearing mink knickers, are you?”
  • To Susan Edwards and her guide dog in 2002: “They have eating dogs for the anorexic now.”
  • On Russia, in 1967: “I’d like to go to Russia very much — although the bastards murdered half my family.”
  • At a Bangladeshi youth club in 2002: “So who’s on drugs here?… He looks as if he’s on drugs.”
  • At the Duke of Edinburgh Awards ceremony in 2006: “Young people are the same as they always were. Just as ignorant.”
  • To 13-year-old Andrew Adams in 1998: “You could do with losing a little bit of weight.”
  • To Cate Blanchett, after discovering she worked in the film industry, in 2008: “There’s a cord sticking out of the back [of my DVD player]. Might you tell me where it goes?”

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